{"id":984,"date":"2017-11-14T15:20:43","date_gmt":"2017-11-14T08:20:43","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/thecopywriterclub.com\/?p=984"},"modified":"2018-01-04T10:41:14","modified_gmt":"2018-01-04T03:41:14","slug":"highly-sensitive-entrepreneur-heather-dominick","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/thecopywriterclub.com\/highly-sensitive-entrepreneur-heather-dominick\/","title":{"rendered":"TCC Podcast #57: How to know if you&#8217;re a highly sensitive entrepreneur with Heather Dominick"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>In the 57th episode of\u00a0<em>The Copywriter Club Podcast<\/em>, Kira and Rob talk with Heather Dominick who coined the term, highly sensitive entrepreneur\u2014a name for business owners who are more sensitive to the demands of start-up and freelance work. During our conversation, we asked her:<br \/>\n\u2022 \u00a0what a \u201chighly sensitive entrepreneur is\u201d and whether it\u2019s a weakness we need to overcome<br \/>\n\u2022 \u00a0how to know if you were born highly sensitive\u201420% of us are<br \/>\n\u2022 \u00a0whether there\u2019s something wrong with Rob who is highly insensitive<br \/>\n\u2022 \u00a0what being highly sensitive means (and the superpowers HSEs have)<br \/>\n\u2022 \u00a0a few questions you can ask yourself to find out if you\u2019re an HSE<br \/>\n\u2022 \u00a0how to work (or live) with someone who is highly sensitive<br \/>\n\u2022 \u00a0how to approach work (and life) as a highly sensitive entrepreneur<br \/>\n\u2022 \u00a0the importance of processes and systems to support your work as a HSE, and<br \/>\n\u2022 \u00a0how to network as an HSE.<\/p>\n<p>We also asked Heather about the similarities between HSEs and introverts (they\u2019re not the same thing) and how her business has changed since she started approaching things as an HSE. This discussion is a little different from our typical episode but shines a light on a personality type that many copywriters deal with regularly. To listen, click\u00a0the play button below, or scroll down for a full transcript.<\/p>\n<div class=\"powerpress_player\" id=\"powerpress_player_9614\"><!--[if lt IE 9]><script>document.createElement('audio');<\/script><![endif]-->\n<audio class=\"wp-audio-shortcode\" id=\"audio-984-1\" preload=\"none\" style=\"width: 100%;\" controls=\"controls\"><source type=\"audio\/mpeg\" src=\"https:\/\/media.blubrry.com\/thecopywriterclub\/content.blubrry.com\/thecopywriterclub\/TCC057.mp3?_=1\" \/><a href=\"https:\/\/media.blubrry.com\/thecopywriterclub\/content.blubrry.com\/thecopywriterclub\/TCC057.mp3\">https:\/\/media.blubrry.com\/thecopywriterclub\/content.blubrry.com\/thecopywriterclub\/TCC057.mp3<\/a><\/audio><\/div><p class=\"powerpress_links powerpress_links_mp3\" style=\"margin-bottom: 1px !important;\">Podcast: <a href=\"https:\/\/media.blubrry.com\/thecopywriterclub\/content.blubrry.com\/thecopywriterclub\/TCC057.mp3\" class=\"powerpress_link_pinw\" target=\"_blank\" title=\"Play in new window\" onclick=\"return powerpress_pinw('https:\/\/thecopywriterclub.com\/?powerpress_pinw=984-podcast');\" rel=\"nofollow\">Play in new window<\/a> | <a href=\"https:\/\/media.blubrry.com\/thecopywriterclub\/content.blubrry.com\/thecopywriterclub\/TCC057.mp3\" class=\"powerpress_link_d\" title=\"Download\" rel=\"nofollow\" download=\"TCC057.mp3\">Download<\/a><p class=\"powerpress_links powerpress_subscribe_links\">Subscribe: <a href=\"https:\/\/subscribebyemail.com\/thecopywriterclub.com\/feed\/podcast\/\" class=\"powerpress_link_subscribe powerpress_link_subscribe_email\" target=\"_blank\" title=\"Subscribe by Email\" rel=\"nofollow\">Email<\/a> | <a href=\"https:\/\/thecopywriterclub.com\/feed\/podcast\/\" class=\"powerpress_link_subscribe powerpress_link_subscribe_rss\" target=\"_blank\" title=\"Subscribe via RSS\" rel=\"nofollow\">RSS<\/a><\/p>\n<h3>The people and stuff we mentioned on the show:<\/h3>\n<p><em>Sponsor:<\/em>\u00a0<a href=\"http:\/\/www.airstory.co\/club?utm_source=thecopywriterclub.com &amp;utm_medium=shownotes\">AirStory<\/a>\n<a href=\"https:\/\/alibrown.com\/radio\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Ali Brown\u2019s <em>Glambition Radio<\/em><br \/>\n<\/span><\/a><a href=\"https:\/\/www.amazon.com\/gp\/product\/0307352153\/ref=as_li_tl?ie=UTF8&amp;camp=1789&amp;creative=9325&amp;creativeASIN=0307352153&amp;linkCode=as2&amp;tag=brandstory00-20&amp;linkId=c47a8589b07589f2a82e52967b51db5e\"><em>Quiet<\/em><\/a> by Susan Cane<br \/>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/businessmiracles.com\/freetool\/hse-quiz.html\">HSE Quiz<br \/>\n<\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"><a href=\"http:\/\/www.businessmiracles.com\/\">Heather\u2019s Website<br \/>\n<\/a><\/span><a href=\"http:\/\/kirahug.com?utm_source=thecopywriterclub.com&amp;utm_medium=shownotes\">Kira\u2019s website<\/a><a href=\"http:\/\/kaleighmoore.us11.list-manage.com\/subscribe?u=7bdb50a2eb0d5b0a501cd1bf4&amp;id=9bf46b3e1d\"><br \/>\n<\/a><a href=\"http:\/\/www.brandstoryonline.com?utm_source=thecopywriterclub.com&amp;utm_medium=shownotes\">Rob\u2019s website<\/a><a href=\"http:\/\/kaleighmoore.us11.list-manage.com\/subscribe?u=7bdb50a2eb0d5b0a501cd1bf4&amp;id=9bf46b3e1d\"><br \/>\n<\/a><a href=\"https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/groups\/thecopywriterclub\/\">The Copywriter Club Facebook Group<\/a><a href=\"https:\/\/thecopywriterclub.com\"><br \/>\n<\/a>Intro:\u00a0<a href=\"https:\/\/soundcloud.com\/fauves\/content-for-now\">Content (for now)<\/a><br \/>\nOutro:\u00a0<a href=\"https:\/\/itunes.apple.com\/us\/album\/gravity\/id304219081?i=304219099\">Gravity<\/a>\n<h3>Full Transcript:<\/h3>\n<p><em>The Copywriter Club Podcast<\/em> is sponsored by Airstory, the writing platform for professional writers who want to get more done in half the time. Learn more at Airstory.co\/club.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Rob: <\/strong>What if you could hang out with seriously talented copywriters and other experts, ask them about their successes and failures, their work processes, and their habits, then steal an idea or two to inspire your own work? That\u2019s what Kira and I do every week at <em>The Copywriter Club Podcast<\/em>.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Kira: <\/strong>You\u2019re invited to join the Club for episode 57, as we chat with business coach and founder of the highly sensitive entrepreneur movement, Heather Dominick, about how personality traits affect business success, what it means to be highly sensitive, how to deal with the sensitive people in our lives, and what this all means for copywriters.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Kira: <\/strong>Heather, welcome!<\/p>\n<p><strong>Rob:<\/strong> Welcome Heather.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Heather:<\/strong> Thank you so much. So happy to be here. So happy to be here with both of you!<\/p>\n<p><strong>Kira:<\/strong> Well, when I first heard of you, it was on Ali Brown\u2019s Glambition Radio interview with you. I was on vacation and somehow randomly stumbled upon that particular interview and I remember being like, oh my goodness! This is me! I had no idea that this was a thing and it was kind of like finding out from Susan Cane that I was an introvert a couple of years back when I was like, oh this makes sense! This all makes sense! And then I forced my husband to listen to the interview again so that he would understand why I am the way I am and so ever since then, I knew that we needed you on this show to really help communicate what this is all about to highly sensitive copywriters and copywriters that maybe aren\u2019t as highly sensitive as well.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Heather:<\/strong> Fantastic! I love that so much. Did your husband listen to the interview that I did with Ali Brown? Did that help?<\/p>\n<p><strong>Kira:<\/strong> It did help. I feel like this is already a couple of months ago, I feel like it\u2019s something that maybe we need to revisit every once in awhile just to be like okay, remember why &#8211; this is why I\u2019m doing this this way? So it doesn\u2019t fade away. And I think a great place to start is with your story &#8211; just, how you discovered that you\u2019re a highly sensitive person and entrepreneur?<\/p>\n<p><strong>Heather:<\/strong> Sure! Absolutely. I\u2019m so happy to share. Well, I would say first that I\u2019m in my 14<sup>th<\/sup> year of being self-employed and in the first half of my self-employment career, I had no idea that I was highly sensitive at all. I didn\u2019t even really know what that term was or what it meant and so, the first half &#8211; the first seven or so years of being self-employed &#8211; I was able to create some significant success in my business. I had brought my business across the million dollar mark at that point and it came at a very high cost.<\/p>\n<p>I found myself absolutely, completely overwhelmed, overworked, and over-exhausted. And at that time, I was working with a mentor who I\u2019ve come to understand was mismatched for my highly sensitive nature, and you know, she really pushed her clients to create more and the amount of income that her clients were generating was very important to her and what I\u2019ve come to understand since is that that plugged right into what I now have coined and referred to as one of the HSE coping mechanisms, the coping mechanism of pushing, which was definitely my coping mechanism of choice. What that means is that a person who\u2019s highly sensitive will choose a coping mechanism unconsciously to deal with their highly sensitive nature. And someone who tends towards the coping mechanism of pushing\u2014like myself\u2014versus hiding, which is the other coping mechanism, or what I like to say is combo-plattering, which is swaying back and forth between the two, was someone who will tend towards the coping mechanism of pushing, they will get done what a person who is not highly sensitive can get done but again, it will come at a massive cost because it takes a different level of energy.<\/p>\n<p>So, at that point in my business, when again, I had crossed the million dollar mark but it had come at that high cost, I really was thrown into you know, what many spiritual teachers refer to as a dark night of the soul. I really just withdrew from everything at that point except for just continuing to pour the love that I had for my clients you know, into my work with them. But I withdrew from that mentorship, I withdrew from anything and everything on the internet, and I really went deep inside of myself because my question for myself at that time was, what am I doing?! And you know, is this worth it? If this is what it takes to be a successful entrepreneur, then I\u2019m not sure I\u2019m up for it. It was in that period of self-discovery that I was brought to Dr. Elaine Aron. And Dr. Elaine Aron is the founding researcher in regards to the aspect of what it is to be a highly sensitive person. And she developed or started that research in the early 90\u2019s and when I discovered Dr Elaine Aron and I took one of her high level assessments and I came to understand what being highly sensitive meant, I wasn\u2019t so surprised that I was highly sensitive, but I was surprised at how highly sensitive I was.<\/p>\n<p>And then what I did was I took another one of Dr. Aron\u2019s assessments and I brought it into a high level group of 25 women entrepreneurs that I was working with at the time and lo and behold, every single woman in that room was also highly sensitive. What was really surprising about that was not so much that they were highly sensitive, because I\u2019m a real believer &#8211; and one of the foundational principles that I teach &#8211; in your ideal client being a version of you. But what was interesting is that not one woman wanted to be highly sensitive. They really saw it as a weakness. That was really my first indication that something was up here. That\u2019s really what dove me into my own extensive research about not only what it means to be highly sensitive, but what does it mean to be highly sensitive as a person who\u2019s called to be self-employed?<\/p>\n<p>That is really what began my journey and all of the teachings and trainings and tools that I\u2019ve developed since then to support those of us who are highly sensitive who are called to be self-employed so that we can do what it takes to be self-employed but in a way that really matches who we are so that we don\u2019t have to go into those coping mechanisms of pushing or hiding or combo-plattering, but can actually really be at peace within our business while also creating prosperity.<\/p>\n<p>And that\u2019s the scoop!<\/p>\n<p><strong>Rob:<\/strong> There\u2019s a lot to unpack there. My first question is, of course, going to be how do we know if we\u2019re highly sensitive? But I\u2019m almost wondering if this is a man\/woman thing? Does this skew one way heavily to another? How do we know if we are?<\/p>\n<p><strong>Heather:<\/strong> That\u2019s an awesome, awesome question.<\/p>\n<p>So first of all, it\u2019s not gender-defined and I also always like to say that if you are highly sensitive, you were born into the world this way. And the basic description or definition of what it means to be highly sensitive is that your nervous system is wired differently than someone who is not highly sensitive. And according to Dr. Elaine Aron there is 20% of us in the population globally who are born into the world highly sensitive. What it means that your nervous system is wired differently is that, for example, something that might not even be stimulating to someone who isn\u2019t highly sensitive like say, maybe loud noises. Right? Like, going to a rock concert. But someone who is highly sensitive is going to take that barely stimulating sensation for an 80%\u2019er and their system is going to register it as extremely stimulating, if not absolutely bowl you over stimulating. So it\u2019s not male or female.<\/p>\n<p>However, because of the way that our culture has been created and is understood, it takes a lot more for a man to admit or come to an understanding that he\u2019s highly sensitive. How can you tell if you\u2019re highly sensitive? Well, one of the first ways is to take an assessment that was developed by Dr. Elaine Aron or, if you\u2019re a person who is self-employed, to take the assessment that I developed with Dr. Elaine Aron that helps you understand if you are a highly sensitive entrepreneur.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Rob:<\/strong> Is this something that manifests in different parts of our lives? For example, you know, I might go to a movie and get a little teary eyed at the end, or I might listen to Pavarotti sing Caruso and it\u2019s really sort of overwhelming, but then at work, I\u2019ve made people cry at work and didn\u2019t feel bad about it.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Kira: <\/strong>Wait, what?! You\u2019ve made people cry at work, Rob? (laughs)<\/p>\n<p>Rob: I\u2019m gonna flat out come out and say I think I\u2019m highly insensitive, but then I do see times in my life when I\u2019m sensitive to some things. So does it manifest differently in different parts of your life? At work vs. personal.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Heather:<\/strong> No, I\u2019m smiling.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Rob:<\/strong> So I\u2019m faking it in the movies and I\u2019m full-on insensitive.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Heather: <\/strong>No, you\u2019re not faking it. I\u2019m smiling because I\u2019m so appreciate this approach! First of all, there\u2019s a difference between being sensitive and being highly sensitive, in the same way that there\u2019s a difference between being highly sensitive and being introverted. Not one equals the other. So, for example, my husband is not highly sensitive, but he\u2019s a sensitive man. So it sounds like for yourself, Rob, when you go to the movies, that\u2019s a sensitive moment for you. But from the rest of what you\u2019re describing, is that you\u2019re not highly sensitive.<\/p>\n<p>So again this comes back to it being literally a biological wiring of your nervous system versus something that is simply emotional. It can\u2019t be compartmentalized because you are who you are. I so appreciate your question because that comes up a lot for people who are HSE\u2019s, and that\u2019s really where the coping mechanism comes in is because most highly sensitive have not been taught how to manage their highly sensitive nature, so they\u2019ve developed these coping mechanisms to try to be able to you know, survive if not at least manage in a world that tends to be designed for those who are not highly sensitive. Does that help?<\/p>\n<p><strong>Rob: <\/strong>So it\u2019s normal that I cried when Terminator the robot gets melted into a vat of whatever, but I\u2019m still mean at work&#8230; I get it. (laughs)<\/p>\n<p><strong>Heather:<\/strong> Well&#8230; I didn\u2019t say normal&#8230; but (laughs) I\u2019d say acceptable.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Rob: <\/strong>Fair enough.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Kira: <\/strong>I think we should talk about why Rob is making people cry at work and dive into that! (laughs) Maybe that\u2019s for another time. So, I would love to hear more about, for people who might be listening and not highly sensitive, and maybe even rolling their eyes at the labels, because many of us kind of cling to these labels as I did when I first heard you. Like, thank goodness, I finally understand &#8211; I have this label! But what would you say to anyone feeling that way or thinking that way about why this is important for all of us to understand? Especially as copywriters and entrepreneurs &#8211; why is this important for both parties?<\/p>\n<p><strong>Heather: <\/strong>First, I would say, it\u2019s probably valuable to speak to what I\u2019ve created and refer as Your HSE Shadow and your HSE Strengths. So I\u2019ve really identified twelve top shadows and twelve top strengths, and I\u2019m not going to go into all of those, but it\u2019s helpful to just understand the differentiation because again, very similar to those initial twenty five women that I gave the assessment to, when you\u2019re looking at the language of highly sensitive and seeing it as a label, that can be detrimental. Right? Because your mind will immediately associate meaning. So, again, if we go back to the understanding that highly sensitive just means that your nervous system is wired differently than someone who\u2019s not highly sensitive, then how that can show up in a shadow-side, meaning when you haven\u2019t really learned how to manage these abilities, then for example, an HSE shadow is overwhelm. An HSE will tend to get overwhelmed that much more quickly than someone who\u2019s not highly sensitive. Another HSE shadow is over-protection, where a highly sensitive will work really hard to kind of try to protect themselves so that they don\u2019t get overwhelmed. And again, that\u2019s where the coping mechanisms come in. Another shadow is people-pleasing. Because a person who is highly sensitive has the ability to really be able to intuit what\u2019s going on for another person, they can fall into what I refer to as a chameleon state, where you can kind of match yourself to whoever you\u2019re with to try to just make them happy. It\u2019s a really people-pleasing nature. And then on the flipside, when you do learn how to manage your abilities, your highly sensitive abilities are absolutely strengths that can really support you, one, in your calling to be self employed, and two, just in your life in general.<\/p>\n<p>You really need to know, though, how to be able to manage the energy so that you are showing up in strengths and I even like to say that when you really get these strengths working for you, they\u2019re kind of like super-powers. They\u2019re really at your disposal in a way that is not available for the other 80%. Someone who\u2019s not sensitive. So for example, an HSE strength, is that we are extremely intuitive. Another is that we\u2019re also very empathic and another is that we\u2019re really deep listeners. We can hear things literally between the lines, or deep within the energy, that\u2019s gonna go right over the head of an 80%\u2019er.<\/p>\n<p>So, back to your question of how to really be able to use this within being self-employed, whether you are or aren\u2019t highly sensitive, or even within the workplace &#8211; it sounds like you might be asking &#8230; for example, a person who is self-employed, most highly sensitives are attracted to roles that fall within what Dr. Elaine Aron refers to as being a royal advisor.<\/p>\n<p>We are here, literally brought to the planet, to basically be able to create balance and keep the peace, versus the other 80% that Dr. Elaine Aron refers to as the warrior kings and queens. I added the queen. (laughs) So, what\u2019s a royal adviser? That is someone who is a coach, right? Or a therapist. Or, anyone who falls within the healing arts or healing practitioners. You\u2019re a massage therapist, you\u2019re reiki practitioner, you\u2019re a nutritionist, or a creative entrepreneur, which &#8211; copywriting, in my opinion, would really fall into. Right? So we can take those HSE strengths and we are then excellent coaches &#8211; amazing healing practitioners, and very talented creative entrepreneurs.<\/p>\n<p>For someone who is not highly sensitive, they\u2019re going to approach the field of coaching very differently. I\u2019m not going to go off on this, but it is kind of a crow in my side or whatever that phrase is. Let me say this: a lot of warrior kings and queens who have entered into the coaching industry are really not offering coaching. They\u2019re just offering really excellent internet marketing or info-marketing. And that\u2019s very different than the approach of someone who is a really excellent coach and really excellent at deeply listening and really being able to intuit and really be able to support their client in an empathic way.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Rob: <\/strong>So, I want to back up just a little bit. You mentioned that to find out if we\u2019re an HSE, that we need to take a survey and without going into the entire survey, are there like a top two or three questions that we can ask ourselves and if the answers are yes, then maybe we should take the entire survey and if the answers are no, you can meet Rob for a drink later? We shouldn\u2019t worry about it, is what I\u2019m thinking. What are those questions?<\/p>\n<p><strong>Heather: <\/strong>(laughs) First of all, it\u2019s not a survey, it\u2019s more of an assessment or a quiz, and also there\u2019s nothing to worry about if you are highly sensitive. So a couple of those questions would be do you react deeply to subtleties within your environment? Meaning, do you really notice if the temperature is off, if sound is loud, if there\u2019s an extreme smell? That would be one question. Another is, do you get overwhelmed easily or do you get overstimulated easily? And another question might be, do you find yourself often tending towards procrastination in name of perfectionism? Those are some examples.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Rob:<\/strong> Okay, so, if we\u2019ve answered those, we ought to look into it more and if we say no, we\u2019re not any of those things, then we\u2019re something else.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Heather:<\/strong> Yes, (laughs) you\u2019re probably not highly sensitive. But I will say that when you take the HSE quiz that I offer, not only will the quiz let you know if you\u2019re highly sensitive, but it will let you know if you are somewhat highly sensitive, super highly sensitive, or like me, super uber highly sensitive. And then you\u2019ll receive a free success guide that will help you begin to understand how to work with that information.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Kira: <\/strong>Yeah, I\u2019m pretty sure I was highly uber sensitive when I took the quiz. So, when I hear all of this, you know, how you can flip your shadows into your strengths, it all sounds great to me. I\u2019m like ooooh, I want this, I want this, I want this &#8211; but, actually getting there is the hard part so I\u2019d be curious to know just what this looked like in your business once you realized that you were highly sensitive; what changes you had to make in order to turn those shadows into strengths.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Heather: <\/strong>Yeah, it\u2019s a great question and it\u2019s really the base of everything. You know, that I teach in my mentoring programs. And I really appreciate that you recognized and acknowledged that it\u2019s a process. That\u2019s what a lot of HSE\u2019s bump up against &#8211; they get to a place where they understand that they\u2019re highly sensitive, but then there comes in a lot of resistance when it comes to the process of retraining how to manage their sensitive abilities. Which, makes sense! Because again, most of us have been doing it one way, you know, most of our lives! And that\u2019s for most of us who are self-employed, a pretty long time! You know, at least 20 or some-odd years. AGain, that\u2019s where the coping mechanisms come in and you have to kind of detangle those coping mechanisms. And that was really the process that I started for myself.<\/p>\n<p>So, first I had to you know, really get clear to understand what does this mean, that I\u2019m highly sensitive? And now, how can I approach everything that\u2019s absolutely necessary in my business? How do I approach selling, for example? How do I approach marketing? How do I approach operations? In a way that are really designed to use my strengths rather than throw me into my shadows. So I had to go really deep with some reconfiguring and being able to see things differently. And so just as a quick little addition, forward slash side note here, that\u2019s really where my work with a course in miracles came into my experience and my process. So I\u2019ve been a student of a course in miracles, which is a psychological and spiritual curriculum for over thirty years now, and the real essence of that teaching is that the definition of a miracle is a shift in perception.<\/p>\n<p>And so, my business is named \u201cA Course In Business Miracles\u201d Because that\u2019s what\u2019s really needed for a highly sensitive to be able to be financially successful &#8211; a shift in perception. They need to be able to first learn how to look at themselves differently, and not see themselves as weak and not see themselves as less than, and then they need to be able to have a shift in perception and how they approach their business to look at, again, selling, marketing, selling, operations, differently.<\/p>\n<p>Then, to be able to create a shift in perception about how it is that they\u2019re meant to show up and to be in all of the role aspects that are needed as a person who is self-employed. So again, that\u2019s everything that we go through in the Business Miracles Mentoring Programs, is the inner part is a retraining of the mind in terms of how you approach yourself, how you approach your business, how you approach your life, and then the practical application of a specific process, tools, and systems to really support the HSE in being able to be in their strengths.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Rob: <\/strong>Heather, I want to ask if there are certain things that those of us who may not be highly sensitive or might even be highly insensitive ought to be doing differently in dealing with a business partner or a spouse or a child who is highly sensitive.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Heather: <\/strong>So, the first part is really just the willingness. To be willing to recognize that not everyone is like you. And that\u2019s really for all of us. But, we can again, boil it down to those of us who are highly sensitive and those who are not. For example, you know, as a person who is not highly sensitive, you might be able to work in an open cubicle environment and you can put your headphones in and you can be rocking out to some music and you\u2019ll be so super productive and you\u2019ll get things done. That type of environment would completely just wash out a person who is highly sensitive. They would not be able to focus and they would not be able to be as productive. But that doesn\u2019t mean that there\u2019s anything wrong with them, it just means that they just need someone different in order to be able to produce a level of high and effective and efficient productivity. And so, again, first, just the willingness to consider the possibility that not everyone is like you. The second step would be, be willing to work with your colleagues, your co-workers, your employees, to find out how they work best. Are they highly sensitive? Are they not highly sensitive? First and foremost. You know, the focus of this interview.<\/p>\n<p>But even from there, there\u2019s all different types of learners, ways that people process information. For Example, one of the things that i do with my team is that I have them take a collaborative intelligence assessment that helps all of us understand how does each person on the team process information? And there\u2019s those of us who our first go-to is auditory, some of us is visual, some of us are kinesthetic. And that can be really helpful, because you don\u2019t then expect someone who processes information kinesthetically first &#8211; you don\u2019t expect them to be able to just hear something and then be able to work with it. So, those are then the next steps. Right? Once you\u2019re willing and then once you find out, and then to actually take the steps to set up the working environment so that you are honoring how each individual works differently. And it sounds easy, but I\u2019ll say probably where most people get caught, is step number one. Just that willingness to consider the possibility that not everyone is like you.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Kira:<\/strong> And, how do we start &#8211; how do we create this shift in perception\u2014if we\u2019re highly sensitive? How do we start\u2014if I want to start today and just start making some slow changes\u2014what could I do on my own to work towards that?<\/p>\n<p><strong>Heather: <\/strong>I would say, first, you know, take the assessment, right? And look at your score, so that you do have a sense and again, if you\u2019re taking the assessment that I\u2019ve created, are you somewhat, are you super, are you super uber, and then begin to understand for yourself you know, what does that mean specifically for me?<\/p>\n<p>How does my highly sensitive nature &#8211; how is that really showing up in regards to shadows? For example, first and foremost, where do I shut down? Where do I tend to take myself out? Where am I kicking into the coping mechanisms of pushing and hiding? So those would be the first to kind of just unpack how this is currently showing up for you.<\/p>\n<p>And then, the second, is to you know, begin to use tools like those that I\u2019ve created or anything that you design for yourself, to begin to manage those shadows. So, that requires first and foremost that you\u2019re not willing to just accept them. That\u2019s a very important piece because the work that i do in the Business Miracles Mentoring Programs, are in no way about enabling our highly sensitive abilities, or playing into being highly sensitive as a victim. Absolutely not. It\u2019s the exact opposite\u2014it\u2019s a process of empowerment\u2014it\u2019s a process of transformation. But in that second step, right? Like after you\u2019ve gotten clear about how this is showing up for you and then you\u2019re really beginning to look at how you want to begin do you know, use some tools to begin the process of reconfiguring, reengineering, you know, the way that you\u2019re showing up, part of that is to be willing to accept that it\u2019s okay that you are different.<\/p>\n<p>If I was teaching right now, I would say to everybody, write that down. (laughs)<\/p>\n<p>That\u2019s really the key place. Because so many of us have been trained for so long by our culture and society to believe that it\u2019s not okay that we\u2019re different and again, that\u2019s where the coping mechanisms come in. And once you\u2019ve come to that place that you can accept that you\u2019re different, you can begin to work with tools to do things differently, and then the next piece is really about being able to begin to communicate with those around you about your difference and what you need.<\/p>\n<p>Again, to be able to communicate that from a place of empowerment, from a place of you know, acceptance of yourself and of others, and not from a place of victimhood or entitlement. But really, you know, again, from that\u2014I like to refer to it as a regal queen place. You know, you\u2019re strong, you\u2019re grounded, you\u2019re confident, and then you\u2019re able to really know yourself, accept yourself, and communicate what you need from that place.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Rob: <\/strong>Heather, I want to ask the opposite of my last question. I imagine that there are lot of copywriters who are highly sensitive that are working directly with entrepreneurs who may not be sensitive at all. I wonder if there are things that they need to be doing differently in dealing with people who are not sensitive beyond communicating that they are highly sensitive.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Heather: <\/strong>I appreciate this question so much because most likely, what is currently happening in that scenario is what happens for most highly sensitives in most areas, all areas, of their life. Which is, when they are working from their shadows, they will turn themselves into a pretzel, again, really kicking into particularly the coping mechanism of pushing, to get the job done, for a non-highly sensitive in the way that the non-highly sensitive wants it done. And what will happen is that that will completely shut down\u2014implode, burnout\u2014the highly sensitive. And that\u2019s why you know, many highly sensitives don\u2019t succeed in being self-employed. That tends to fall into two categories. People who come to my programs. One is the person who hasn\u2019t even started self employment yet because they\u2019re like, so terrified, and then the other is someone who has really made their business work, but you know, they\u2019re on the edge of burnout or they\u2019re already there. So what you want to do instead is again, going through those steps, you know, that I had just shared with Kira, right? First knowing yourself as a person who is highly sensitive, accepting yourself as a person who is highly sensitive, and then being able to use tools and trainings and teachings to help yourself be able to communicate what you need.<\/p>\n<p>It\u2019s those last two pieces that are imperative for this situation that you just described.<\/p>\n<p>For example, a person who is highly sensitive and is working from their strengths as a copywriter, they want to be able to communicate first and foremost, the value of how they work and what they\u2019re able to create, and then what they need in order to be able to get that done.<\/p>\n<p>That is where a keyword for highly sensitives comes in and that is: boundaries. That is the exact opposite of a highly sensitive who\u2019s working in their shadows, turning themselves into a pretzel, chameleoning themselves to match what a non highly sensitive needs. So, I could easily say like, I\u2019m an excellent copywriter. I will be able to create for you and produce for you, copy that will absolutely be attracting your ideal client. I can even confidently say that we\u2019re going to put together this sales page and we\u2019re going to be converting 80% of the people who land on the page. But here\u2019s how I work and here\u2019s what I need to get it done. I\u2019ll work in this time-frame, I\u2019ll do check-ins at this time, please don\u2019t contact me anytime in between, I\u2019ll make sure that I\u2019m following through, you\u2019ll get updates at this time, we\u2019ll have it done at this point. Just as a very general off the top of my head example.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Rob:<\/strong> And how would that person respond if the answer is, cowboy up, get to work? However we would respond as those of us who are not so sensitive.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Heather: <\/strong>(laughs) Well, I don\u2019t know what cowboy up means (laughs)\u2026<\/p>\n<p><strong>Rob:<\/strong> Suck it up, or pull it together\u2014you know, somebody who isn\u2019t being very empathetic is what i\u2019m saying, towards those needs. Is there a way to respond?<\/p>\n<p><strong>Heather:<\/strong> The response would be that you would return to holding your boundaries, right? So if you work off of what I modeled, I didn\u2019t in any way model\u2014oh my God it\u2019s so hard for me to create copy, just don\u2019t bother me, i really just need quiet space\u2014but I communicated I\u2019ll get the job done, this is how I\u2019ll do it, these are the check-ins so I\u2019m making sure that I\u2019m communicating with you, and I can tell you it will be done by this date.<\/p>\n<p>If somebody comes back and says, well that\u2019s not gonna work for me because I need to be able to check in with you whenever I can and I changed my mind and I just need what I need when I need it, and then the response would be absolutely, I hear what you\u2019re saying, and I want to tell you in order to be able to produce my most effective work, which is extremely effective and here are some testimonials to back it up, this is how I need to work. So, I can tell you we will absolutely get that final result for you, but this is the way that it\u2019s going to unfold.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Rob: <\/strong>Love it.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Kira:<\/strong> Yeah, this is so interesting because I have struggled with boundaries, gotten better, but a lot of the copywriters that Rob and I have worked with in our Accelerator Program also struggle with boundaries and it seems like the best way to deal with it is by creating some type of process so it\u2019s concrete and you\u2019re going to each client every single time with the same process so it feels like you have a foundation and some boundaries, even when you struggle with this. But I\u2019m also just wondering, what does it look like for a copywriter who might just be starting out, does not have those boundaries in place, is highly sensitive &#8211; would you recommend that they just kind of increase the boundaries with each project? I have a hard time imagining this new copywriter would make any drastic changes because of a bad experience. It seems like it would have to just be a very gradual process.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Heather:<\/strong> Well, I really appreciate that you just instinctively\u2014probably because you\u2019re highly sensitive\u2014spoke to the importance of processes and systems because that\u2019s really just so much of what I teach and the foundational principle trainings of my 6 month mentoring program. Both inner and outer processes and systems. But you\u2019re exactly right\u2014having those processes and having those systems will really support the highly sensitive entrepreneur in really being able to effectively communicate. That\u2019s why I teach what I refer to as Your Unique Serving System. So you\u2019re effectively communicating a process about how you work, and how you deliver the service that you\u2019re here to deliver. And then setting up systems that support being able to deliver what you\u2019re saying you\u2019ll deliver. So, you\u2019re literally creating a frame for yourself so that you\u2019re not going into those shadows of overwhelm, procrastination, perfectionism, over-protection, etc.<\/p>\n<p>Now, speaking to the second part of your question is where inner processes and systems come in. And that is also what I teach in my foundational principle trainings for exactly that reason. It is literally foundational principle training number one is what I refer to as energy management, where I teach you specific, tangible tools to help you be able to manage your nervous system, to be able to manage your energy, to be able to manage your emotions. So when it comes to that new copywriter, and learning how to set boundaries, you know, ideally they\u2019re receiving the training like the one that I provide so that they\u2019re learning how to manage themselves.<\/p>\n<p>It doesn\u2019t have to be a trial by error, which is what I hear you describing, right? Which is kind of you chaotically enter into like a first you know, project and it just is like crazy and overwhelming and then ahhhhhh! how do I learn from this? But that is what happens to a lot of HSE\u2019s but there is an alternative and that is everything that I teach. That is everything that I\u2019m about. Being self-employed does not need to be torturous.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Kira:<\/strong> And I\u2019d love to even shift a bit too, for those same new copywriters, you know, they\u2019re trying to find new clients, they need to market themselves, which is often hard for many of us, how can they use their HSE powers, their superpowers, to really market effectively?<\/p>\n<p><strong>Heather: <\/strong>That\u2019s a great, great question. And again, just so much of what I teach, and let me also say that everything that\u2019s in my foundational principle trainings has come from my own experience and it came from the experience of entering into being self employed. Now, like I said at the beginning of this interview, I didn\u2019t know that i was highly sensitive, but of course, I was, so everything I was designing for myself to be able to you know, cope with being self-employed, was really, I was designing it to be able to you know, manage my highly sensitive nature. So, you know, one of the things when it comes to marketing and using your HSE strengths, your HSE superpowers, is you know, I always say this and most HSE\u2019s are like their first reaction is, (gasps) No! And that is: Networking!<\/p>\n<p>When you approach for example, networking, understanding that you\u2019re highly sensitive, not approaching networking in the way that it\u2019s taught for those who are not highly sensitive, but as a person who is highly sensitive, we do really well with intimate relationships. For most of us who are highly sensitive, if you did a survey, you would probably find out that most highly sensitives have a smaller amount of significant friendships, versus a large amount of more general acquaintances. So networking is a place where we can show up as a person who is highly sensitive, not from the direction of trying to work the room, not from the direction of trying to pitch ourselves, but from the direction and intention of creating one, maybe two or three, deep connections. And what happens when a highly sensitive approaches networking in that way, as well as with some other aspects that I teach about networking, is one\u2014your presence in the room is refreshing because you\u2019re showing up differently because you are &#8211; two, you\u2019re using your HSE strengths, like your ability to listen deeply, think deeply, feel deeply, to make a genuine connection, hear what a person needs, or be able to communicate genuinely in a grounded way about how your service solves a certain problem. And to be able to hear if someone that you\u2019re talking to needs what you have or knows someone who needs what you have, and you can make a real solid connection that then you can follow up with, and can very easily and you know, in my experience with those that I teach, literally like 8 times out of 10, turn into some form of business, that then, just all of the countless unnecessary disconnected business cards being thrown at you kind of just falls away. And you\u2019re able to just really focus in on the most needed, effective, source of connection and then again, following the steps to create and move that into solid business. So that\u2019s just one example.<\/p>\n<p>But I think what\u2019s important to highlight there, is that when I share that networking is a very effective form of marketing for highly sensitives, most highly sensitives\u2019 reaction is, don\u2019t make me do that. Because they have been trained or heard or assumed that it\u2019s going to have to be something that\u2019s so incredibly painful and uncomfortable for them.<\/p>\n<p>And number one, it doesn\u2019t to be, and number two, what often tends to happen is that HSE\u2019s tend to try to find forms of marketing where they don\u2019t actually have to be seen. And what that turns into is a lot of wasted time and energy that tends to not turn into business, meaning like, a lot of time spent online and you know, trying to like, throw up amazing websites or you know, do crazy social media, you know, all of that just creates a disconnected effect.<\/p>\n<p>That\u2019s just one example.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Rob: <\/strong>Heather, I just have one more question for you and it feels like in listening to you describe that process that there\u2019s a lot of crossover between highly sensitives and introverts. What are the differences, or are they very much the same?<\/p>\n<p><strong>Heather: <\/strong>That\u2019s a great question. They\u2019re definitely not the same, so you can absolutely have someone who\u2019s highly sensitive who\u2019s not introverted and you can have someone who\u2019s introverted who\u2019s not highly sensitive.<\/p>\n<p>Again, just going back to the definition and the description of what it meant to be highly sensitive, it\u2019s how your nervous system is wired. So that doesn\u2019t necessarily mean that you\u2019re introverted by nature. Without going into it too much, you might, as a highly sensitive, have another aspect of being highly sensitive which is a high sensation seeker, which you actually really like to do extroverted activities, it\u2019s just about again, approaching it in a different way so that it doesn\u2019t create over-stimulation. Or, you could again have someone who\u2019s introverted, which if we go to the basic definition of being introverted, it\u2019s basically that any kind of you know, extroverted activities take a lot of energy from you and you need to replenish yourself in another way, versus someone who is extroverted who will get filled up from those activities.<\/p>\n<p>But that doesn\u2019t necessarily mean that you\u2019re highly sensitive. Doesn\u2019t mean that your system necessarily is wired differently. So there could be crossovers, but it\u2019s not a definite.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Kira:<\/strong> Before we wrap, I think it\u2019s really easy like you said for us to make excuses for maybe not scaling our business or really turning our business into what we always dreamed about because we\u2019re highly sensitive. And of course, you\u2019re all about empowerment so I think it would be great to end on really a look at your business, if you don\u2019t mind just sharing what does your business look like today, as far as how you\u2019ve structured it? And that may also lead into the ways that anyone listening may be able to work with you if they\u2019re highly sensitive and interested?<\/p>\n<p><strong>Heather:<\/strong> Sure! Today, I have a million dollar plus business and it looks and feels so much differently than you know, seven years ago when I was really in that pushing and shadow place and dark night of the soul. So, first and foremost, an important part of my work and just the journey for an HSE in general, is the process of getting really clear about what you want your business to look like. Then, really going back to those three steps that I shared with you earlier, Kira, is accepting that. And that\u2019s really significant part of the process for HSE\u2019s and the reason is, is that it can be so easy to get caught up in the other 80% and trainings that are delivered for the other 80% when it comes to business building and you know, the entrepreneurial journey and that\u2019s definitely where I was when I was in the dark night of the soul. It was kind of like, if you weren\u2019t bringing your business to the million dollar mark, like, there was something wrong with you. Like that\u2019s what you do. And you try to reach as many people as possible, get as many people as possible, make as many sales as possible but when you really go through the process of being willing to get clear about what\u2019s important to you, and what do you want and you need, and what are your values as an HSE, not every HSE is meant to have a million dollar business. And there is nothing wrong with that. I have a lot of people in my business miracles programs who they\u2019ve chosen to have a business that\u2019s really just about working in person. They\u2019re barely even online. And they have a solid financially successful, sustainable business that supports a lifestyle that they just feel good about and are happy &#8211; what else do we really need? Right?<\/p>\n<p>So that\u2019s the first part is really getting clear and I had to do that for myself and when I did that and I got clear &#8211; I didn\u2019t get clear that I was meant to have a million dollar business or that it was about a million dollar business &#8211; what i got clear about is that I have a message and I have trainings and teachings and tools that I have developed that are really, really life changing and business-altering for people who are highly sensitive and are called to be self-employed. So, my calling is to deliver that to as many HSE\u2019s who need it and who want it and who are available to receive it and so what that has looked like, is a larger scale. What I have then chosen to put in place in order to be able to answer that call, is a team that I feel really good about working with that we as a team are microcosm of the community that we serve and represent &#8211; the Business Miracles Community &#8211; and that we have a real shared, harmonious approach to how we deliver these teachings that we all believe in. From a front-end and a back-end.<\/p>\n<p>And that has then enabled me to have a schedule that really works for me so, for example, I pretty much don\u2019t do anything before 11am, and I\u2019m pretty much done at 4pm. And that is every other week. And on alternate weeks, I\u2019m in a space of deep study and learning and creating of content and writing and materials. Just as an example of what that looks like currently for me. However, I would never, ever expect or try to enforce that that is what any other HSE needs to do or is meant to do. And so again, we\u2019re back to the first step of what is it meant to look like for you? Can you accept that and then can you begin to take the actions to create it?<\/p>\n<p><strong>Rob: <\/strong>Heather, this has been awesome. I think Kira probably reached out to you so that I could learn how to communicate better with her. (laughs)<\/p>\n<p><strong>Heather: <\/strong>Good for Kira! (laughs)<\/p>\n<p><strong>Rob: <\/strong>But it\u2019s also going to help with some other highly sensitives in my life. But, having said that, if somebody wanted to connect with you, learn more about you, where would they find you online?<\/p>\n<p><strong>Heather:<\/strong> Sure! Take the quiz! Right? Find out if you are highly sensitive and if you are a highly sensitive who\u2019s meant to be an entrepreneur and you can find that hsequiz.com and like I said, after you take that quiz you\u2019ll find out if you\u2019re somewhat super, or super uber, and you\u2019ll be delivered a success guide that will help you get started and if you are and you\u2019re looking for help and support, we\u2019ll take the next steps from there.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Kira:<\/strong> Thank you, Heather!<\/p>\n<p><strong>Rob:<\/strong> That\u2019s great. Thank you very much for spending time with us!<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>In the 57th episode of\u00a0The Copywriter Club Podcast, Kira and Rob talk with Heather Dominick who coined the term, highly sensitive entrepreneur\u2014a name for business owners who are more sensitive [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"_coblocks_attr":"","_coblocks_dimensions":"","_coblocks_responsive_height":"","_coblocks_accordion_ie_support":"","footnotes":""},"categories":[2],"tags":[79,3],"class_list":["post-984","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-podcast","tag-heather-dominick","tag-podcast"],"acf":[],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v26.7 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>TCC Podcast #57: How to know if you&#039;re a highly sensitive entrepreneur with Heather Dominick - 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