Long distance relationships are never an easy feat. It’s either you make it, or you break it.
And no, I’m not talking about Boon Lay to Changi kind of distance.
I’m talking about being hours apart by plane for months and months. For some, it may even be for years (yikes). Just thinking about being in a long distance relationship, or in short, LDR (not to be mistaken for Lana Del Rey) makes me quiver a little.
They say that if you survive a LDR, you can survive almost anything in a relationship.
I can check ‘being in a LDR’ off my Life List. Two years, to be exact. During the two-year period, I’ve been asked plenty of times: How do you do it? Wow if I were you, I don’t think I can make it. Are you going to visit him? When is he coming back?
Those questions alone were taxing, really.
Unfortunately for me, due to certain circumstances, I couldn’t visit him nor could he come back to Singapore. It was that insane. Within two years, I probably only saw him for two months.
Other than that, it was all just plain virtual communication. There were loads of crying, ‘I miss yous’, missed phone calls due to the time difference and frustration. It was pretty intense. As weeks and months go by, I started to crave for more affection and also the dreaded thought of when I was going to see him again.
If you’re going to step into the world of LDR anytime soon, don’t be afraid! It may be challenging, but there is still hope. Especially if you know when exactly you’re going to see each other. Most importantly, you’re both ready to commit.
Patience
Naturally, I wasn’t a very patient person, but being in a LDR meant that there may be a chance where your partner won’t be able to reply you or call you on time. Sometimes, you won’t be able to talk for the entire day. That’s when I kept busy with my day-to-day schedule in order for time to swift by. It’s nice to look forward to talking on the phone with your love at the end of a long day.
Communication
If you were like me and you didn’t have the chance to visit your partner, communication is key. Texting, phone calls, video calls. Thanks to technology, you don’t have to snail mail your messages across the sea anymore. It’s vital to make the effort to communicate with each other, even if the both of you are tired. A simple ‘I love you’ or ‘I’m thinking of you always’ could make their day even by just a bit.
Trust
When not communicating, each of you will be busy with school or work. That means meeting other people every day, which includes the opposite sex. It’s important that you keep each other updated with where you are or who you are with. No, I don’t mean being too ‘clingy’ or ‘overly attached’. Avoid secrets (unless they’re birthday surprises or surprise visits!) and lies. It’s already bad enough that the both of you are so far away from each other. The last thing you’d want is to have paranoia and uneasiness sweeping over you and having arguments over the phone over petty things. Ugh.
Distance does actually make the heart grow fonder
When you finally get to be in the arms of your beloved again, you appreciate the time spent with your them even more. Everything that you’ve been through is actually worth it.
If given a choice, it’s safe to say that I most definitely do not want to go through it again. I don’t regret it, but the experience has actually made me a stronger and better person than I was before I entered a LDR.
Have you been or are you currently in a long distance relationship? Feel free to share with us more on how you and your partner cope!
